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2011 Prize & Time Results

2011 Official Prize & Time Results

OMG, It’s within the week and we’ve got Prizes & Finish Times up! Our Awards Ceremony was once again kicked off by Environmental Encroachment and hosted at the Bottom Lounge. You all truly outdid yourselves this year by coming out 146 teams strong to race in snowy and windy weather. We’ll be listing our final tally of both funds raised and food driven to Chicago Anti-Hunger Federation within the week (along with our multitude of thank you’s), but for now, please know that you ALL are deserving of prizes, praise and awe for all the creativity and gusto you bring to the CHIditarod!

Team # Team Name Prize Category
92 The Derailers (over $5000 raised) Most Epic Fundraiser
80 Candyland Crew (Tweeted throughout the race… fun, interesting, colorful tweets especially when they spelled out C-H-I-D-I-T-A-R-O-D over the course of a few tweets) Chitwitterod
92 The Derailers (Steam Engine Train, wheels that moved, train whistle and dressed in period costume) Best art cART
82 Action-Squad (Stagecoach with top seat, monsterously huge – in the racer category and could fit through the entrance door – in period costume!) Industrial Design
199 Hipsters (winners of the die roll among last 10 teams) DFL
62 Area 3 All Stars #2 (2:58:00 Finish Time) 3rd Place Time
84 Teen Team Wolf! (2:54:00 Finish Time) 2nd Place Time
53 Area 3 All Stars #1 aka The Lady Gaga’s (2:49:00 Finish Time) 1st Place Time
129 Bridesmaidzillas! (200lbs of food) — special mention goes to the Hipsters who were not present, but by all accounts had closer to 250lbs of food 2nd Best in Food
53, 52, 70 Area 3 Allstars #1, #2, #3 (over 9,000lbs of food) Best in Food
139 The Loch Ness Mobsters (impressive paper máché Loch Ness Monster that ate garbage and pooped whiskey) Bike Marshal’s Choice
107 Peace Be Da Journey (feathers for tarring and feathering are not LEAVE NO TRACE) Most Honorable Dishonorable Mention
82 Action-Squad 3rd Best in Show
98, 122 RMS Tit & anic (the humongous ships’ two halfs and teams dressed in period costume) 2nd Best in Show
110, 66 Kermit and Friends & Muppets take Chicago (home-made muppet head awesomeness!) Best in Show
115 Gybe Ho’s (muffins, feeding their way into the judges hearts) Best Bribe
53 Area 3 All Starts #1 aka The Lady Gaga’s (handed out “skip this checkpoint” certificates, stumping even some judges with the official CHIditarod patch logo) Best Sabotage
92 The Derailers (presented by Action-Squad for helping the Action-“damsels”-Squad in distress out when their cart broke down)…wasn’t meant to replace, but award given instead of Spirit of CHIditarod Action Squad Dynasty Award of Epic Awesomeness
98 RMS Tit (for correctly answering trivia to spell CARTPARTY! and writing a riveting tale about Frederick Cart) Chi-Trivia
103 Team Axis of Evil (received extra bonus points for presentation with an assist from Soup R Crackers – Crazy world Helluva lot of evil Incarceration unfairly, Dirty bombs Infidals Attack Tyrannasaurus rex And nuclear weapons Rebuttal to that On this day Day of chiditarod!) Acrostic
60 SwingVote (due to copywrite infringement and national safety this is not available, ok it was probably lost otherwise, but ya know) Lim-rod
68 Team Z (“Majestic Unicorns are fucking Awesome!” and if you look on the internetz you’ll find the picture to go with it) Pictogram
140 Brutals Puzzle
163 Queequeg’s Ambergris (purple rain/prince move that has apparently won this man many a prize, including a wife!) Best Dance Move
178 Just The Tip Best in Vulva
177 Rainbow Bright (babes doing synchronized dance moves) – and rumor has it that the Deloreans were robbed of the chance to compete here – something about tear away pants! Short Cart Showdow
Breen Clan – for being amazingly resourceful and resiliant and feedin’ the needin’ in a massive way. Rawkin Support Award
Clem – Phyllis’s for being the one checkpoint to be with us every year of the CHIditarod and leading the way in making donations of profits from the day towards Charity Rawkin Support Award
Minimonk – for hosting the starting line year after year Rawkin Support Award
TLP – for being an outstanding mentor and without whom the CHIditarod would not be what it is today Rawkin Support Award
Action-Squad – for racing with us each year, leading the way in Spirit of non-sabotage but having fun and helping others enjoy the CHIditarod and having outstanding costume/themes each year! Rawkin Support Award
Caroline Jourdes (wings logo), Carl Brahms (graffiti cart) Design Contest Winners

 

 

2011 Finish Times – based on us getting your time card at Bottom Lounge. And we are totally remiss in the gigantic advances in automated timekeeping from this year, special thanks to Paul Pagel for getting us headed the right direction for open-source Chidita-timekeeping!

Team # Team Name Finish Time Route #
53 Area 3 All Stars #1 14:48:47 8
84 Teen Team Wolf! 14:54:15 5
62 Area 3 All Stars #2 14:58:50 7
115 Gybe Ho’s 15:04:28 2
113 Lowered Expectations 15:04:54 2
67 Jackie Treehorn & His Magnificant Orchestra of Doom 15:05:13 6
75 The Mr. T Party 15:09:23 6
117 Come On Down 15:12:52 2
47 Danger Zone 15:13:01 8
153 The Patriotic Rednecks 15:13:26 7
134 Homogeneous Homoless 15:14:45 8
70 Area 3 All Stars #3 15:14:58 6
89 Ghost Busters 15:15:44 4
152 Jurrassic Cart 15:16:53 6
163 Queequeg’s Ambergris 15:17:42 5
166 Angry Birds 15:18:56 4
191 Legends of the Ring 15:21:53 5
114 Flying Carp 15:24:18 2
168 Goldman Sacks 15:24:47 6
200 Kill it in the Butt 15:27:21 6
171 Cock, Tail and Wieners 15:28:24 1
170 Or Are you Just Happy to See ME? 15:29:37 8
178 Just The Tip 15:30:36 8
59 Pinot & Friends 15:37:10 7
96 Salesmanipulationship. 15:37:41 3
56 Biggest Boozers 15:38:56 7
140 Brutals 15:41:15 3
71 Third time’s a charm 15:41:57 6
160 ¡MUCHA LUCHA! 15:42:34 6
52 Cereal Killers 15:43:48 3
54 Team Bullrun 15:44:20 8
65 Pequod 15:44:51 6
179 Teenage Mutant Ninja Lesbos 15:45:02 3
184 Oh Gnome You Din’t! 15:45:38 6
68 Team Z 15:45:47 3
190 5 Wise Men 15:46:42 3
48 Penguin Dragons 15:47:16 8
169 Hottie Dogs 15:48:39 7
137 Windy City Rollers 15:49:33 4
112 Black Swan B-Team 15:50:28 2
130 Bananas 15:51:20 5
124 Born Blitzed 15:52:53 6
125 Ghost Dog 15:58:14 7
131 Team Who 15:58:30 5
180 Party Down 15:58:54 8
58 Blue Barracudas 16:03:27 7
107 Peace Be Da Journey 16:03:54 8
73 Team Nicholas Gajewski 16:06:14 6
186 Team Fabulous 16:09:33 8
196 Team RamJam 16:11:38 4
165 Feliz Na’vi-dad 16:14:21 4
49 Team Awesome 16:17:06 8
97 La Fuente de Oro Mexicana 16:18:03 1
182 Blood Sweat and Beers 16:18:20 3
147 Schnitzengigells 16:18:46 1
119 The Rapids 16:19:41 1
90 Up Dawgs *cART* 16:21:07 3
120 We’ll make it to the show 16:22:17 1
135 Estrogen Heavy 16:22:36 2
99 DEAD PRESIDENTS 16:24:11 4
167 Sleaze Patrol 16:25:15 5
123 The Chiefs 16:26:31 5
187 The French Toast Mafia 16:26:42 1
126 Haulin’ Oats 16:26:57 8
91 Hells Bananas *cART* 16:28:18 3
77 The Wedding Crashers 16:28:57 6
74 Go Go Gadget-arod 16:29:46 6
104 Team America (Fuck Yeah!) 16:33:13 2
146 Better late than pregnant 16:34:58 3
159 S.O.D. 16:35:41 5
92 The Derailers *cART* 16:36:35 5
51 Dead Last 16:37:58 8
105 Fire and Nice 16:38:13 3
172 Running of The Bulls 16:38:33 3
64 The Deloreans 16:38:50 6
121 The Death Mobile *cART* 16:38:56 3
144 Soup R’ Crackers *cART* 16:39:08 2
103 Team Axis of Evil 16:40:27 5
158 The Five Amigos 16:41:05 6
143 Farmers from Illinois – Oregon Trail Style *cART* 16:41:37 3
175 Schoolin’ & Foolin’ 16:41:58 3
83 Chicks with Dicks 16:42:33 5
129 Bridesmaidzillas! 16:45:24 4
139 The Loch Ness Mobsters 16:46:28 5
108 Physical Challenge Please 16:46:56 2
101 Breakfast Club 16:47:44 3
78 How We Stopped Worrying And Learned To Love The Bomb 16:48:03 6
118 DUI’s 16:48:41 2
76 De-evolution! 16:50:22 6
151 Large Marge and the Mother Truckers 16:50:45 3
128 Angry Birds 16:51:29 3
177 Rainbow Bright 16:51:55 7
110 Kermit and Friends 16:52:45 4
149 Chick-fil-A 3 16:54:18 4
55 The Bill Murrays 16:54:31 8
72 Majestic Unicorns 16:54:40 6
136 High 5 Functions 16:56:10 5
82 Action-Squad 16:56:15 5
63 Spice Girls 16:56:21 6
57 Polymeracers 16:58:51 7
185 The Thundergnomes 16:59:26 3
61 angry dragon 16:59:32 8
132 Frozen Aqua Foot Lube 16:59:40 6
116 Sarah Palin’s Chicago 17:00:01 3
183 Pac that Ass Up 17:01:37 5
142 Will Act For Food *cART* 17:01:41 1
98 RMS Tit *cART* 17:02:13 3
122 anic *cART* 17:02:16 3
141 Black Swan 17:02:24 2
102 Accidental Inception: The Quest for Contraception 17:03:02 5
69 Dudestorm 17:03:17 6
81 Pure Motherfuckin’ Magic 17:05:49 3
148 Chick-fil-A 1 17:06:18 4
111 Mountain Attack Kill 17:07:24 2
80 Candyland Crew 17:07:59 5
87 Old Norse 17:11:58 3
109 COWABUNGA, DUDE! 17:13:53 2
106 SCAMP 17:14:13 3
150 Chick-fil-A 2 17:17:10 4
50 Man in a Canoe 17:24:00 3
154 Wilocity 17:24:00 8
199 Hipsters DFL Contenders 5
198 Laidback Olympians DFL Contenders 7
133 o-ren ishii & the crazy 88’s DFL Contenders 7
164 Schnitzengiggle DFL Contenders 4
60 SwingVote DFL Contenders 7
176 Wrolf Olsons DFL Contenders 3
188 Alpha Beta 4
192 America’s Largest Water Park 3
79 Ankle Socks 3
95 Football Head and Friends 2
93 Hobo-Q 3: God of Hellfire *cART* 6
145 Hobo-Q 3: What about Bob? *cART* 4
162 Lambda Lambda Lambda 8
173 Milk is for babies, when you get older you drink beer 7
66 Muppets take Chicago 3
86 PRAG 5
174 Runs With Scissors 8
193 Smurfs 3
88 Team Bunny 4
97 Team Charlie Sheen 3
181 Team friendship 6
94 This Is How We Do It 8
155 Waffles 1
156 Wasj U 1
198 Whiskey 6

 

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Chiditarod 2010 Results

EPIC start of CHIditarod 2010. Photo by http://flickr.com/photos/friendlyjoe/

CHIditarod V

120 teams.

150 volunteers.

50 degrees & sunny.

One EPIC start to rule them all.

14,525 pounds of food collected.

CHIditarod V ran into historic glory on March 6, 2010.  120 teams and over 150 volunteers participated in the largest and most successful CHIditarod to date.  The effort and creative prowess of our participants was raised to new heights this year.  Art Carts, Grill Carts, Tanks, Cupcakes, Star Wars, Old People, Fire Engines, BaconRod, ChiditaBoot, and more.  The weather was a balmy, sunny 50 degrees.  The Environmental Encroachment magic circus band celebrated their 5th Chiditabirthday by kicking off the race with their signature flair.  Bellys were filled.  For those of you who won prizes, we offer our heartiest of congratulations! For those of you who didn’t, we remind you once again that it is the journey, not the destination that matters…and also that the CHIditarod’s judges are distinguished not so much by their excellent taste as by their sheer insanity and ability to hold onto a clipboard while inebriated.  CHIditarod is many things to many people.  Whether it be a food drive, race, fashion show, art parade, soapbox, barcrawl, charity, or some of the greatest improv streat theater ever, the CHIditarod Coreganizers salute all who partipated in manifesting CHIditarod V.  EPIC.

Food Drive & Fundraising

The sheer generosity humbles us.  Thank you, THANK YOU, for your heart-felt contributions towards helping Chicago’s hungry.  Through our noble and generous participants, CHIditarod V raised 14,525 pounds of food for the Chicago Anti-Hunger Federation.  Our preliminary reports indicated that the sheer volume of food – delivered in 2 trucks – overwhelmed their warehouse!!  We nearly doubled last year’s food intake.  The tri-teamed Area 3 Allstars raised over 3 tons by themselves!

CHIditarod V also empowered teams to raise funds online for the Federation.  We are ecstatic to announce that over $2,400 was raised for the Federation by these participating teams:

What an incredible show of generosity.  Be proud of your accomplishments, knowing that your efforts will benefit hundreds of fellow Chicago citizens.

CHIditarod is and always will be a charitable and sponsor-free event.  Various organizations throughout Chicago donated time, expertise, goods and goodwill to this year’s CHIditarod and our chosen charity – The Chicago Anti-hunger federation.  We’d like to publically thank the following non-exhaustive list of organizations:

A huge thank you to our 2010 checkpoints for graciously hosting the EPIC this year.  In the spirit of giving, our checkpoints have been asked to donate 15% of their CHIditarod profits directly to the Federation.  We will provide updates on that front soon.  In the meantime, next time you find yourself in one of these fine establishments, mention it to your bartenders!

Prizes

Coreganizer Honor Roll

With the increase in teams each year, it becomes more and more challenging to spot and recognize teams of greatness within a 6 hour timespan.  The miracle of the interwebs let’s us relive CHIditarod through photo, video, and caption.  This year we’re introducing some post-race recognition for those who went above and beyond, but perhaps didn’t bask in the glory as deeply as they were meant to on race day.  We salute you.

  • Sunday Drivers – Always in character, crowd pleasers, shaking hands with bystanders.
  • Men with Large Hoses – The confetti canon!
  • Christians for Haiti (aka TBD All Stars) – Just plain hilarious.
  • Holy Rollers – for being so inappropriately appropriate, and for runningjayhawk’s twitter pics.
  • Svengoolie One – Incredibly fun, supurb execution, great theme, and for staying up all night making chicken.
  • Warenkorb der Feurigen Tod – Grill Carts serving ample amounts of superbly delicous meat and roasted veggies throughout the entire race.
  • The BaconRod – bacon… and more bacon!  Gifting over 30 pounds of delicious mouth-watering bacon to fellow CHIditarodders.
  • Super G Spot & Team Vagazzle – The perfect combination.
  • Flying Circus – a fanfreakingtastic job challenging Action Squad on direct donations!
  • The Breen Flickinger Clan – For feedin’ the needin!

2010 Official Prizes

We gave out about as many prizes in 2010 as there were teams in 2006 (wow).  Scroll way down if you’re looking for timing.

Team # Team Name Prize Category
3 Area 3 Allstars #1 1st Place Time
20 Area 3 Allstars #3 2nd Place Time
71 Gern and the Boys 3rd Place Time
86 Gybe Ho’s Super Bonus Challenge
95 English Cottage DFL
3 Area 3 Allstars #1 Best in Food
14 Yasknuza Yaluza 2nd Best in Food
58 Mountain Attack Kill Best in Show – The Tank!
61 Goonies 2nd Best in Show
5 Ferris Bueller’s Day Off Worst in Show
13 Action-Squad Spirit of CHIditarod
61 Goonies 2nd Spirit of CHIditarod
3 Area 3 Allstars #1 Most Honorable Dishonorable Mention
30 CJ Ownz Best Sabotage – The Chiditaboot!
47 Mario Kart Good Samaritan Award
51 Ron Burgundy and the Channel Four News Team Best Simulated Coitus
116 TEAM VAGAZZLE Best in Vulva
13 Action-Squad Best in Karaoke
71 Gern and the Boys Best in Chaiku
82 The Communist Womanifesto Best in Cheerditarod
61 Goonies Best in Pole Dance
13 Action-Squad Bike Marshal’s Choice
10 Candy Coded Best Art Cart – Spinning Cupcake!
10 Candy Coded Industrial Design
13 Action-Squad Most Industrious Fundraiser
61 Goonies Chitwitterod – racer prize
Brian Lauvray Chitwitterod – nonracer prize
Steve Shanabruch Design contest winner

Photography and Video

There is an enormous amount of photography and videography out there.  We’ve created a CHIditarod 2010 Photo and Video page linking to everything we’ve found thus far.  You can comment on that page with additional links to media you discover across the web.

 

Sabotage

If you were new to the race, welcome!  Hopefully your bruises and egos have healed by now and you’ll consider joining us again.  You may have been surprised at the presence of covert ops, greasy palms, overt sabotage, and general sneakiness present at CHIditarod.  CHIditarod is many things to many people, including an opportunity to “do a good thing, but do it all wrong.”  Creative sabotage is possible and likely during CHIditarod, and its one of the characteristics that makes this event so unique.  We’ve received thoughtful feedback from teams this year about sabotage and how it affects racer dynamics.  We are especially interested in hearing additional feedback on this area.  We will be considering this information carefully as we move forward.  We’re planning on creating a couple how-to guides for next year, including “How not to be a douchebag at CHIditarod” and “CHIditarod for Noobs“.  Both will become instant bestsellers.

 

Wall of Shame

All teams submitting cart deposit refund proof have received their cart deposit refunds as promised as of this point.  The Leave No Trace effort of CHIditarod 2010 was a major improvement over 2009.  Thank you!!  As is (unfortunately) customary, a few teams left their carts behind.  We’ve archived these noble souls on the 2010 CHIditarod Wall of Shame.

 

Flags – a Big Deal

The CHIditarod Coreganizers are a small group of volunteers who expend countless amounts of time and energy preparing, executing, and wrapping (cleaning) up the CHIditarod.  We hold the event and its purpose in the highest regard.  We set the stage for racers to play a very large, exciting, dynamic game in Chicago, all for a very good and needed cause.  It is with sadness that we must share that Yet Another CHIditarod Flag was stolen from the race this year.  The perpetrators were creative in fashioning a ransom note and Polaroid pictures of the captive flag (which was very clever), demanding first place (i.e cash and a trophy) in exchange.  We deplore this heinous act!  Stealing from CHIditarod is of the highest insult and the ugliest display of poor form.  Coreganizers devote countless unpaid hours towards the CHIditarod, which continues to grow in complexity, size, and effort every year.  It is disappointing to know that we are thanked with theft.  As a racer planning sabotage, you might not know where to draw the line.  This is that line.  If you like/love CHIditarod, and want it to continue, please do what you can to ensure that whomever stole the flag in 2010 (and the one in 2009) will have the heart and conscience to return them to us unharmed.  No questions asked.  We’re serious.

 

We Want Your Feedback

Please participate in our post-race survey, which will be sent out to all racers in the next week. Choose your favorite teams in our new people’s choice poll, and tell us what you liked about the race and what you think we should work on for next year.  If you have immediate feedack to get off of your chest, please contact us now.

 

Timing

This is the full list of teams reporting in at the finish line.  If you note any weird spelling of your team name, just let us know and we’ll repair it. If – for whatever reason – your team info is missing from the tally, let us know all the details and we’ll add you.  Yes, we know that the computerized timing system had problems (again).  We have top men working on it.  TOP MEN.

# Team Name Time In Total Time
3 Area 3 Allstars #1 02:39:05 PM 01:51:04
20 Area 3 Allstars #3 02:44:43 PM 01:56:42
71 Gern and the Boys 03:03:34 PM 02:15:33
37 Rickshaw 03:07:08 PM 02:19:07
19 Area 3 Allstars #2 03:10:36 PM 02:22:35
114 Lions & Gorillas 03:11:27 PM 02:23:26
111 Power Biznitch 03:12:06 PM 02:24:05
53 Team MOX 03:16:27 PM 02:28:26
52 Kibbles und Blitzed 03:27:37 PM 02:39:36
14 Yasknuza Yaluza 03:30:06 PM 02:42:05
12 Cub Scout Troop 138 03:30:36 PM 02:42:35
42 Lycra Loin Brigade 03:31:08 PM 02:43:07
15 Polymeracer 03:32:12 PM 02:44:11
50 The Lunch Ladies 03:33:32 PM 02:45:31
29 More Lions! 03:34:18 PM 02:46:17
21 Rub-a-dub-dub 03:38:44 PM 02:50:43
35 Certified 03:39:06 PM 02:51:05
5 Ferris Bueller’s Day Off 03:39:20 PM 02:51:19
81 Super G Spot 03:39:52 PM 02:51:51
40 The Lawbreakers 03:40:12 PM 02:52:11
104 Beer for My Horses 03:41:26 PM 02:53:25
7 Never Nudes 03:42:48 PM 02:54:47
63 Golden Girls 03:46:24 PM 02:58:23
54 The Holy Rollers!!! 03:48:04 PM 03:00:03
101 Gentlemen…To Evil 03:52:22 PM 03:04:21
119 Bad Advice Bears 03:52:43 PM 03:04:42
11 Madman Curie 03:53:10 PM 03:05:09
33 Plastered Paramedics 03:54:32 PM 03:06:31
24 Gump Enterprises 03:54:46 PM 03:06:45
22 Fore Play 03:55:21 PM 03:07:20
31 Jackie Treehorn & His Magnificant Orchestra of Doom 03:55:42 PM 03:07:41
38 Team Burt Reynolds 03:56:45 PM 03:08:44
115 Closed Casket Crew (CCC) 03:57:10 PM 03:09:09
116 TEAM VAGAZZLE 04:03:31 PM 03:15:30
76 The Ghost of DJ Roomba 04:03:38 PM 03:15:37
72 Team Awesome 04:05:17 PM 03:17:16
26 Brokeass Teachers 04:05:33 PM 03:17:32
30 CJ Ownz 04:05:52 PM 03:17:51
118 Flying Circus 04:06:19 PM 03:18:18
78 Drunken Smurfs 04:14:05 PM 03:26:04
84 Metromix Chicago 04:14:30 PM 03:26:29
86 Gybe Ho’s 04:17:57 PM 03:29:56
32 Team BLAND 04:18:09 PM 03:30:08
94 New Zoo Review 04:18:26 PM 03:30:25
28 Band of Gypsies 04:18:50 PM 03:30:49
68 Team Angry Dragon 04:18:58 PM 03:30:57
100 The Warriors 04:20:19 PM 03:32:18
45 We’d Love to Turn You On 04:21:02 PM 03:33:01
77 G Bustas 04:21:59 PM 03:33:58
62 Carnyl Knöwledge 04:22:17 PM 03:34:16
79 The Urban Explorers 04:23:40 PM 03:35:39
69 2CH3-4H 04:24:24 PM 03:36:23
4 Svengoolie One 04:24:43 PM 03:36:42
51 Ron Burgundy and the Channel Four News Team 04:30:57 PM 03:42:56
13 Action-Squad 04:31:04 PM 03:43:03
6 1.21 gigawatts 04:31:13 PM 03:43:12
83 Team Wingspan 04:31:31 PM 03:43:30
48 Real Reality Sucks 04:31:58 PM 03:43:57
96 In Tent City 04:35:58 PM 03:47:57
49 Imma be 04:40:23 PM 03:52:22
82 The Communist Womanifesto 04:40:37 PM 03:52:36
80 Team Ram-Rod 04:42:25 PM 03:54:24
90 Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl 04:43:05 PM 03:55:04
56 I’d Hit It 04:47:29 PM 03:59:28
102 Magic School Bus 04:48:15 PM 04:00:14
112 This aint our first rodeo 04:51:10 PM 04:03:09
99 John’s Team 04:52:00 PM 04:03:59
18 Dudestorm 04:54:08 PM 04:06:07
46 Lactose Tolerant 04:57:39 PM 04:09:38
109 The Coal Barons 05:01:28 PM 04:13:27
1 LAKE’D 05:01:38 PM 04:13:37
10 Candy Coded 05:02:02 PM 04:14:01
61 Goonies 05:03:01 PM 04:15:00
103 Clubbing Baby Seals 05:03:05 PM 04:15:04
59 TBD All-Stars 05:03:15 PM 04:15:14
44 Tricky Dick and ze Jager Meisters 05:03:45 PM 04:15:44
75 The Mooseknuckles 05:04:24 PM 04:16:23
91 Sunday Drivers 05:04:37 PM 04:16:36
67 Ice Road Truckers 05:06:08 PM 04:18:07
88 Revulvas 05:08:52 PM 04:20:51
16 The Tony Danza’s 05:13:33 PM 04:25:32
17 The Chicago Reacharounds 05:15:07 PM 04:27:06
55 Shipwrecked 05:17:48 PM 04:29:47
65 Remember, Remember the 5th of November 05:22:21 PM 04:34:20
89 The Olympians 05:23:37 PM 04:35:36
58 Mountain Attack Kill 05:23:54 PM 04:35:53
47 Mario Kart 05:27:33 PM 04:39:32
120 Jersey Shore 05:27:39 PM 04:39:38
97 Cluck You 05:27:51 PM 04:39:50
60 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 05:32:34 PM 04:44:33
87 Eleven Seven TEAM 05:36:34 PM 04:48:33
110 Baconrod 05:42:09 PM 04:54:08
23 Freakalicious 05:46:49 PM 04:58:48
39 Benetton 05:58:43 PM 05:10:42
95 English Cottage 06:11:21 PM 05:23:21
8 Warenkorb der Feurigen Tod
41 Team Dills
43 Dee dee and her boys
57 DonkeyPunchologists
92 the ninja turtlers
107 The Bennys
113 polska polska
121 Drunk and Woolies
2 Cafaino’s Mustache
9 United Hosers of Canadia, Eh?
25 The Dancing Goombas
27 Team Dinglehopper
34 Men with Large Hoses
36 Mario Kart
64 The Petting Zoo
66 We’re Legendary! Snitches!!
70 Drill. Tap. Screw
73 Jurassic Sparks
74 DePauw
85 RedEye
93 Those Meddling Kids
98 Suit Up!
105 fatcamp
106 Care Bears
108 Paddy Wagon
117 Whiskey and Dreams
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2010 Wall of Shame

Not bad, not bad.  We are happy to mention that nearly all of you removed your carts this year – thank you, thank you, thank you!  The fame-to-shame ratio is WAY up compared to last year.  This could be due to the heftier $50 cart deposit, but we like to think it’s because the noble CHIditarod participants care enough to leave no trace and help make our lives easier.  But enough Fame.. let’s get to the meat of it.  Cart-abandoning teams, we declare shenanigans upon you! And in so doing, you now have a place on the 2010 CHIditarod Wall of Shame.

 

#5 – Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

These guys are incredible.  First they were bestowed the less-then-coveted worst in show award for their general douchebag-a-thon start to finish, then they sent us a photo depicting “removal” of their cart from the Bottom Lounge, which we promptly found in an alley a block away the following day.  AND they continually emailed us saying they brought their cart home.  Liars.  Detention!

shame-5-ferris

So.. really.. what’s with the bike frame chained to the cart?

official-5-ferris

Ferris, please. You’ve gone too far. We’re going to get busted.

 

#31 – Jackie Treehorn & His Magnificant Orchestra of Doom

We have to hand it to this team.  Their cart was the ONLY one remaining in the Bottom Lounge parking lot when our strike-ops team arrived on-scene.  They humped people… but had decent plumage.  We like how they thought to leave their number so we could use it again next year.  Thanks, geniuses.

shame-31-jackie

The last cart standing.  Ballsy.

official-31-jackie

Not sure how this ties in with Lebowski… but The Dude abides.

#88 – Revulvas

A good looking team, for sure.  Too bad they’re liars.  After leaving their cart behind some dumpsters in an alley near the Bottom Lounge, they then had the gumption to send us pictures of them “returning their cart” to the supermarket.  Not only did they leave their cart, they spent time and energy taking a picture for the deposit refund.  That’s not sabotage, that’s just… lying.  Dirty stinky lying.  Sure their CHIditarod cart was wet, and full of trash.  But there’s nothing wrong with an “experienced” cart – one that’s been around the block a couple times, you know…

shame-88-revulvas

Poor cart.  All alone.  Plenty of decent caution tape still attached.  <tear>

official-88-revulvas

E.T… cute!

VLUU L200 / Samsung L200

Faking it.  Awww… cute!

#70 – Drill. Tap. Screw

Rumor has it this team left their cart outside of Five Star after discovering they had been the lucky recipient’s of CJ Ownz’s CHIditarod Boot (winner of best sabotage, btw).  They then left their cart, hopped into a cab, and headed for the finish line.  We didn’t end up finding their cart, but the story is worth telling, as it’s funny and educational.  Screwdrivers, duct tape, and wire cutters – part of your next CHIditarod survival kit.

official-70-drill-tap-screw

CVS Cart

Found with it’s spirit broken, sad, and alone – on Odgen Avenue.

shame-cvs

Next time, gadget.  Next time.

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2009 CHIditarod Results

Epic mushers, veteran and new.  We salute your bravery, ambition, utter disregard for the resonable, and HEART.  The results of the 2009 CHIditarod are in.  First and foremost, the food drive.  The Chicago Anti-Hunger Federation is the recipient of the food drive this year.  Thanks to your generosity and cunning, the 2009 CHIditarod raised 7,758 pounds of food for Chicago’s hungry.   That’s almost 4 Tonnes!

7,758 pounds!

You raced through rain.  You raced through cold.  Your creativity was only rivalled by your lack of good taste and love of the random.  The last of the Wall of Shame has been posted.  A hallowed CHIditarod flag still lies missing.  We’re sending out surveys. Go find and upload Videos and Photos, share your stories of sabotage and redemption, LEAVE NO TRACE next year, and perhaps volunteer (even as a core organizer – we need you!)  Above all, take care of each other and continue spreading your creativity out into the world.  Do it for the children.

Here are the results of the 2009 CHIditarod.

PRIZE

TROPHY

WINNING TEAM

Best Skit

X

Action Squad

Best Limerick

X

???

Best WDSTF

X

???

SuperBonusChallenge

X

Pain in the Nissima

Special Ops Award

X

Alpha Males

Best Use of Raingear

X

N/A

Hot and Drunk

X

BaconRod

Long Drive Home

X

Team Witness

Best Sabotage

X

Pain in the Nissima

DFL

X

Dead Fucking Last

Best Food Truck Driver

X

Randy and Dan

Best Industrial Design

X

TIE: Hobo-Q and Dolphin Fantasy

Most Honorable Dishonorable Mention

X

The team that made the fake route maps

Bike Marshall’s Choice

X

Cop a Feel

1st

X

Pain in the Nissima

2nd

X

Sea Shepherd

3rd

X

???

Best in Food

X

Pain in the Nissima

2nd Best in Food

X

This is the stupidest tea party I’ve ever been to in all of my life

Best in Show

X

Action Squad

2nd Best in Show

X

Richard Simmons

Spirit of CHIditarod

X

Cheers

2nd Spirit of ‘Rod

X

Freedom Frogs

We salute you!

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2009 Wall of Shame

12

Thanks to the large majority of you who took your carts home with you after the event. We salute you. As for the few of you who figured you’d let someone else clean up your mess…

This is how you look when the ugly light comes on.

4 MC’s and a DJ

22

223

Team Heaven

262

2828

Dead Prom Queens

28881

299

Congratulations Team Heaven and Dead Prom Queens. You were the ONLY teams to collect your cart deposits and then LEAVE your carts. Watch out next year girls, cause Frankie’s coming for you.

Master Baiters

ww8

992

Richard Simmons

ww

ee

The Slashers

ew

wwww

Dirty Girl Scouts

eert

rrre

Lil Sad Face Jokers

ewqq

wwwwww

Team America

wwwwwwww

yyyy

Unknown

t

Unknown

rey

This is us cleaning up after your sorry drunk ass.

rrr

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2008 CHIditarod Results

Congratulations, CHIditaroders!

Our hats go off to the 83 teams of the 2008 CHIditarod!

We were blown away by the sheer numbers of participants this year, but even more by the creative spirit, athletic prowess, and delightfully bad behavior that you all brought to the streets of our fair city. Even as the weather turned from mild and sunny to sub-freezing in true Chicago style, almost 400 of you muscled through five checkpoints, three talent contests, and over four miles of asphalt tundra to celebrate with us at the finish line. We know that some of you endured duct-taped wheels, chafing spandex, Criscoed handles, and even had cinderblocks chained to your sleds. But despite these hardships, you mushed on, knowing that there was glory waiting for you at that last watering hole – and failing that, an adorable robot that you could pummel incessantly with snowballs.

For those of you who won prizes, we offer our heartiest of congratulations! For those of you who didn’t, we remind you once again that it is the journey, not the destination that matters…and also that the CHIditarod’s judges are distinguished not so much by their excellent taste as by their ability to hold onto a clipboard while inebriated.

If you were new to the race, you may have been surprised at the presence of covert ops, greasy palms, overt sabotage, and general sneakiness in this year’s event. We try to place limits on this kind of illicit activity, but…this is Chicago after all. One team took these hijinks to a whole new level, precipitating a heated controversy that we are calling Chiditagate 2008.

Food Drive

The number of teams doubled again this year, but the amount of food gathered per team grew as well. There was so much we lacked the logistical capacity to weigh it all. We dispatched four vehicles – a 15 foot cargo van, an SUV, a station wagon, and a pickup truck – full to overflowing. We think it topped two metric tons. The food was donated to Onward Neighborhood House in the Ukrainian Village and through Burners without Borders to King of Glory church on Chicago’s south side. Another glorious success!

We Want Your Feedback

Please participate in our post-race survey, which will be sent out to all racers in the next week. Choose your favorite teams in our new people’s choice contest, and tell us what you liked about the race and what you think we should work on for next year.

Race Results and Partial List of Prizes

The Adjusted Time takes into consideration the heat a team was in. Teams in heat 2 had 18 minutes deducted from their final finish time, and teams in heat 3 had 36 minutes deducted. The heats were separated by 18 minute intervals. Only teams that turned their time cards in at the finish are included.

* Denotes Chiditagate 2008 victim. See Chiditagate 2008 for the meat.

 

Rank Team Heat Adjusted Time Prize Award
1 Windy City Rollers B * 3 2:51:45 1st Place Epic Trophy & $100 (donated to charity!)
2 Death by Highkicks 3 2:52:20 2nd Place Epic Trophy & $100 (donated to charity!)
3 A way in a manger 3 2:57:00 3rd Place $50
4 Killjoy * 3 2:51:20 Honorable Dishonorable Mention Epic Trophy & $100
5 Windy City Rollers A 3 2:58:25 2nd Best Sabotage $50
6 Alpha Males 3 2:59:05 Most Testosterone Gift Bag – Virtu stationary $25
7 Show us your cans 1 3:05:20
8 Frosted flakes 1 (DQ) 1 3:05:21
9 Roll with the punches 2 3:07:00
10 Dolphin Fantasy 1 3:08:25 Best in Show2nd Best Skit Epic Trophy and $100$20 Gift Cert to Club Lucky
11 The bucktown apes 1 3:09:00
12 Wonka 2 3:09:55
13 No bull 1 3:10:00 Best Mustache Wax $25 & Accentric Custom Framing Photo Case
14 Frosted flakes 2 (DQ) 1 3:11:10
15 12 inches round 3 3:11:10
161 Chicago Hash House Harriers 1 3:11:40 2nd Best in Food $50
17 Man vs. Wicker Park 1 3:13:35
18 CP D’oh 3 3:15:45 2nd Spirit of CHIditarod
19 BoaBobs 2 3:17:50
20 Serenissima 2 3:18:08
21 Double Dare 3 3:19:00
22 Cropdusters 3 3:19:20
23 Cool Runnings 2 3:21:55 Best Finish
24 Four Degos & a princess 2 3:23:25
25 Polish Ninjas 2 3:23:50
26 Schpascie Kadettes 3 3:24:00
27 Superbad 2 3:24:20
28 Poultry in Motion 3 3:27:45 Best Chaiku Gift Cert – Red Hen Bakery $10
29 Project Run Away 2 3:28:52
30 Drunken Pillagers 2 3:30:00
31 Action Squad 2 3:30:01 2nd Best in Show $50
32 Off in the Shower 1 3:30:45
33 The furies 1 3:30:55
34 Pac Man 2 3:33:30
35 Babies gone wilde 3 3:33:30
36 Phillis’s Guilligan Island 1 3:34:10
37 Sesame Street Allstars 2 3:34:30
38 Atta boy Bear Cat 1 3:35:55
39 Grail Hunters 2 3:36:57 3nd Best in Food Gift Cert – Bazar’s Women’s Clothing $25
40 Brew 2 3:36:58
41 Virgins 3 3:38:05
42 Drinktown Pirates 3 3:39:30 Best Air Cannon $25 & Picture Frame from Accentric Framing
43 Clown Team #1 3 3:40:55
44 Team Sabotage 2 3:41:05
45 Pancares 3 3:42:00
46 Silly Funny Goof Gang 3 3:42:35 Best Fashion Gift Cert – Radiance Fine Jewelry $100
47 Sesame Street 2 3:42:45
48 Pastafarians 3 3:44:00
49 Mormon Mushers 3 3:44:05
50 Bitches 3 3:44:08
51 Team Oregon Trail 3 3:44:50
52 PWDAS 3 3:44:55
53 A Running Commentary 1 3:46:59 Worst Sabotage
54 Manifest Destiny’s Child 3 3:51:00
55 Where the Wild Things Are 1 3:51:45
56 CJ ownz 2 3:51:55 Best Sabotage $50
57 Walmartini 3 3:53:25 Spirit of CHIditarod Epic Trophy
58 Henrietta Pussicat says meow meow meow die 3 3:54:00 Best in Food $100
59 Not so super heroes 3 3:55:50
60 Team Yellow Hammerz 1 3:55:55 Worst Fashion Gift Cert – Lustre Skin Boutique $25
61 Vikings – Ivan Ragnarok 2 3:58:10 Most Pathetic Display
62 Hobo Junction’s Gifts for Jesusesus 1 3:58:35 3rd Best in Show 

Best Skit

 Gift Cert – Bazar’s Women’s Clothing $25Accentric Custom Framing $75
63 Cat Ladies 3 4:00:25
64 Granny Cart 3 4:01:09
65 Ambulance Chasers 3 4:01:10
66 Shopping cart 5k 3 4:09:10
67 Cody West and the Rodeo 1 4:09:50
68 Bucktown Boars 3 4:12:00
69 Blankline Oregon Trail 2 4:13:10
70 Fisherman Minnow 1 4:18:10
71 Ramrod 1 4:23:05
72 Clownsanity 1 4:24:20
73 Odin & the Valkyries 2 4:25:00
74 Holy rollers Dirty Sanchezez 2 4:27:25
Team Bird 3 n/a
No Timecard, reported post-race Where’s your Waldo 3 3:24:45
Timecard gone the way of the buffalo Animal Patrol n/a Dead Fucking Last $50

NOTE:
This is based off of the team race cards that were handed in to race officials. Sometimes these cards were dirty, ripped, burned, illegible, or generally missing. If you note any weird spelling of your team name, just let us know and we’ll repair it. If your race card didn’t get turned in and you’re not listed here, also let us know all the details and we’ll add you.

 

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2007 CHIditarod Results

Once again, the CHIditarod reigned supreme in size, scope, and difficulty. The temperature hovered in the high twenties for the entire race, as opposed to last year’s warm, clear skies. 50% MORE teams participated. Two additional checkpoints were added, bringing the total to four. The race was just around 4.5 miles. Sabotage reared its sinister head on numerous occasions. Carts tipped, everyone went home with bruises and frostbite, and the overall response was overwhelmingly positive.

By the Numbers

  • 34 teams finished the race.
  • 40 volunteers manned various posts along the route.
  • 10 organizers put months of planning into the event.
  • $900 in prize money was given out.
  • 2,353 lbs. of canned food collected.

Results

  1. Corporate Dalliance
  2. 2040 Bears
  3. Team Zissou
  4. EMTs
  5. Furries with Fury
  6. Unstoppables
  7. Swedish Chefs
  8. Buck Funnys
  9. Cold Warriors
  10. Invincibillies
  11. Whammy
  12. Smokey the Beers
  13. Mother Hubbard’s AllStar Cubbard
  14. Arrrrrrr
  15. Pirates of Lake Michigan
  16. Chicago Vice
  17. Yargh and the Shoulder Parrots
  18. The Canned Goods
  19. Pixie Revolts
  20. Knights in Quest of the Holy Ale
  21. Action Squad
  22. Shotski #1
  23. Prairie Fire Drinking Team
  24. Go Ninja Go!!
  25. My Water Just Broke
  26. Lucky Charms
  27. Drinktown
  28. Supermarket Superheroes
  29. Larry Particle and the Bonnaroo AllStars
  30. Shotski #2
  31. Kiss Our Klotczkys
  32. CTA Blue Line
  33. Nuns on the Run
  34. Arms Racers

Best Skit

  1. Supermarket Superheroes
  2. Action Squad
  3. EMTs
  4. Invincibillies
  5. Nuns on the Run

Prize Winners

  • 1st place: Corporate Dalliance – $100.00 + trophy
  • 2nd place: 20/40 Bears – $100.00 + trophy
  • 3rd place: Team Zissou – $50.00
  • Best In Show: Action Squad – $100.00 + trophy
  • Second-Best In Show: CTA Blue Line – $50.00
  • Third-Best In Show: Larry Particle and the Bonaroo AllStars – $50.00
  • Best In Food: Cold Warriors – $100.00 + trophy
  • Best Skit: Supermarket Superheroes – $100.00
  • Spirit of CHIditarod: Invincibillies – $100.00 + trophy
  • Best A/V: Arm’s Racers – $50.00
  • Best Sabotage: Corporate Dalliance – A mahogany trophy
  • Best Bling: EMTs – $50.00
  • Furthest Distance Traveled: Buck Funnys – $50.00 (They came from Columbus, Ohio!)
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2006 CHIditarod Results

The turnout was spectacular. The race was intense. The beer was cold. The carts were FULL of food!
826Chi's 2006 "Pony Up" team

Team Name Team Slogan Place Lbs food
Captain Slam and the Four Hodags By the power of greyskull. 1 57.75
Runaway Bride 2 44.75
Biking Vikings Handjob 3 29.25
Palmer Park Freedom Funk Five THE MOTHERSHIP CONNECTION WILL ROCK YOU TO THE STARS! 4 ?
Double Dare WE TAKE THE PHYSICAL CHALLENGE 5 42
Action Squad . Pac-Man Open up and say awesome 6 28
Go Ninja Go! .DO IT FOR SAVANAH . THE TEAM WHORE. 7 52
Snakes On A Plane Every last motherfucker on the plane is gonna die. 8 27.75
Lost Boys I do believe in Fairies! 9 43.25
Mai Tai Why don’t we get drunk and screw? 10 45.5
Hot Electric Rock Party DJ!! Party DJ!! 11 14.25
Agricropalypse Satan’s On Our Side 12 53.5
Supa-Fly-Ditarodders BRINGING THE FUNK…AND THE PAIN 13 30
Haz-Mat-Rats Yay Team! 14 185.5
Spring Sprang Sprung Ushering, calling forth spring 15 61
The Janitors Sweep the Nation! 16 22.25
DrinkTown START THE NIGHT RIGHT! 17 42.5
Spirit of St. Fuck Shit Up FUCK SHIT UP! 18 21
Sad Sacks: Beyond Bowladrome Knock Em All Down 19 50.75
Pony Up: The Cart-Wranglin’ Division of 826CHI Yeehaw!! 20 61.25
Pixie Revolt .Ain’t NO Ogre gonna bring-me-down!. 21 25.25
937.5